Cycling superstar Pieto Sagan is under scrutiny from RUSA officials after being caught on video signing a waiver during a randonnee – a cardinal no-no for randonneurs.
Rusa official Bob Eagle was too disgusted to respond in person about the incident but promised to send a string of scathing emails to Pieto, the RUSA official who got him to sign the waiver, and whoever the hell was volunteering that day. He also mentioned that he was wondering why the hell the guilty RUSA official was not wearing shoes and socks, dammit.
At the finish control Sagan was questioned in between swigs of chocolate milk and fork-fulls of cup a noodles. He just looked confused, asked someone about their frame bag and reached for a beer. Volunteers present were questioned as well but were too busy checking to see who was still on course and trying to hear what the DORK was saying about a lost randonneur. RUSA official Bob Eagle doffed his doo rag and offered this prepared statement:
“Let this be a warning to riders and volunteers alike – irregularities in paperwork and similar stupid stuff will result in a reduced randonnee calendar for all riders. I repeat, keep the paperwork in order or you will just have to do some unstructured fun ride and mess up your RUSA stats. Further, the adventure series is hereby cancelled. You have been warned.”
Responses from riders who witnessed the statement ranged from ‘Rules schmules’, to ‘what’s a waiver’, ‘stupid stuff what’s that?’ and ‘are you going to eat that’. Stay tuned to CRC for further developments!
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