Hey miss! You are very charming! You’ve got 650b or what?
You might be thinking to yourself: Me, try to pickup a randonneuse in the street? Sorry I’m not that kind of guy…
“And that’s exactly why it will work!”
Trolling the street is often associated with catcalling boors. I deliberately use the word troll (with its pejorative connotation) to show you that there is nothing wrong with the term or the “activity”: trolling the street.
Today you will see why most guys don’t flirt in the street, how to get started, and why it’s better than staying home Saturday night surfing the Internet looking at bike porn.
Why don’t more guys troll the street? And why does it seem so difficult?
If you look among loving couples most were formed because they found themselves in the same social group (shared values). This is not necessarily bad but it limits many meetings!
So why not do it? Quite simply because it’s scary! The fear of taking a “rake”, not knowing what to say, being seen as a jerk, a heavy, a lout…we fear for our reputation. On the other hand why couldn’t we just say “Hello, you’re pretty and I’d like to meet you.” Impossible? And why not?
So how to overcome these obstacles? How to get started? Do’s and Don’ts!
The number of randonneuse you’ve looked at is equal to the number you haven’t approached? If you intend to change this then read:
By having the “cojones” and assuming your place and desires (definition of a real man) you should be able to get results quickly.
To summarize here are the two principles to remember:
COURAGE: Yes, I know it offends but you need to come out of your shell.
You’re not too bad, you have a bit of style. Don’t hesitate, you have nothing to lose. At worst she will be flattered and say “Thank you, that’s nice but I have a boyfriend” even if it’s not true, and will leave all happy. You are a man, you’re brave. Go for it!
HONESTY: We must be honest about our intentions — yes, you’re trolling, do not try to hide it, there’s nothing wrong.
Take this example:
If an ugly randonneuse comes up to you and says “Excuse me, but I just wanted to say that you’ve got great style,” I can guarantee that your day will be successful. Then distill some happiness around you.
“But what do I say to her?”
Observe and utilize the context to get out your opening sentence — which need not be of exceptional quality.
• And how do you like this piece (At an art gallery)
• Were you talking to me? Sorry, because with my headphones on I wasn’t sure. I was listening to some nice music from that advertisement… You know the one? (On the bus)
It’s not very complicated, let’s say it’s simple but challenging. But let’s get to the interesting part.
Meet the challenge!
Careful, here come the adrenaline!
You may be thinking it will take 1000 attempts. It’s sometimes true but the way you say it makes all the difference. Here of course, we must ensure the level of presentation: nice outfit, confidence. If she’s not pleased things aren’t likely to go much further.
• Be dressed properly, stylish jersey, kit, etc,.
• Have clean and fresh breath
• Sometimes it’s important to trim your nose and ear hairs
• Go for it! She will be flattered and tell her friends
• Take her everywhere, in the streets, back alleys, quiet country roads
• Don’t hesitate. Don’t make make false excuses, “she wasn’t so good with her fender line”, “I’m late for an appointment”
• Don’t ask for the serial number too quickly. Have fun, enjoy the moment.
Why is this better? How will it change your life?
“I suggest you meet your neighbor, or that pretty randonneuse across the way”
You do not want to follow the crowd, don’t go out with the randonneuse of your best friend. So get out there, be sociable, train yourself, be thin and light, seduce all!
• You will experience strong emotions: it’s like the best roller coaster ever, free at your doorstep.
• Authenticity: a meeting she will not forget
• Infinite possibilities: in the big cities, rando nanas are everywhere
• Control of your love life: you no longer suffer the choices of others, you choose what you like
After a while you will obtain a confidence in yourself that will serve you in your personal and professional life.
A few opening lines to modify depending on the situation and your style:
• Do yo have the time? / Do you know where…? No just kidding, I’m not interested in that. I just wanted to flirt with you. To be honest, I was looking at the window of the bike shop there and I sensed you roll by with your supple tires and I thought it was the fluttering of butterfly wings.
• I probably shouldn’t tell you this, I’m already late, but I had to stop at least to tell you that you were pretty. I now it seems stupid, but I like seeing a randonneuse with big supple tires.
The more honest you are the more you communicate intense emotions and you feel a deep connection. And “Wahoo!” It’s refreshing, invigorating, exhilarating! See what you think, fully express your personality. Take your responsibilities as a man, and take the first step.
Hoping to have been simple and concrete I await your responses.
•What prevents you from doing so? Do you have a trick to overcome your fear?
•You have already tried? What are your results?
•Wondering how to put it all together? How to get her attention? How would you do it?
Editor’s note: Translated from the Esperanto by Ravi S.